You have to learn the difference between troubled towns (Gecko, Klamanth, Redding, etc.) and actual towns with guards, like VC and NCR. The populations vary, and there is little to protect you in any town except the NPC guarded ones. VC is indeed nice, it has some nice shops as well as a guarded bank requiring membership (though banks are still FUBAR aren't they?).
Frisco is a great place, imho, and even at low levels, I would reside around the area, though it was dangerous due to the strong encounters there. The amount of shops there, however, is a great plus, and I just generally loved the area and the few quests. Another positive is the train there, which takes you to Adytum, which is another guarded area that sees few players but has several locations with not-too-difficult encounters.
Starting solo is difficult. You have a lack of information, resources, and have to generally face everything without knowing anything, including other players. "Is he gonna shoot me?" Assume yes, though this is paranoid to hell, it serves well as enough people shoot noobs for the lols. Don't carry worthwhile stuff into towns, or rather, don't idle with them. Get a tent soon as possible (which itself is a feat, as getting 10 hides as a low lvl can be quite hard) though asking in nice towns can often get someone to help or just give them to you. Do not rely on this though. Never rely on generosity. Begging just makes me not wanna help you at all, though I've often ran off and gotten hides for noobs... well, just because. I had the hp and means, they did not. Gathering ten hides is immeasurably easier for me than them and its a bit of a linchpin to enjoying the game and starting a hoard.
Find a nice town that fits you, hopefully with people you can get along with, make a tent, and try to do something you enjoy. Avoid the 'free' (Towncontrol) towns because militia is just a tool gangs use like hitmen.