When you're playing a game in RP way, gameplay is here to support your RP. You can RP controlling a town, but you have to really take that town IG. If not, why you even bother with playing the game?
Same thing here. If you want to do official visits, get some power, earn IG respect by controlling towns, fighting for ressources...
(and yes, to do that you better know damage formulas, or at least have friends who know it)